Q: When did the Pilgrims land at Plymouth Rock? A: 1620. As you can see, I’ve memorized this utterly useless fact long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever. You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the s Q: Where is Plymouth Rock? A: I am not presently at liberty to divulge that information as it might compromise our agents in the field. Q: Explain Newton’s First Law of Motion in your own words. A: Yakka foob mog. Grug pubbawup zink wattoom gazork. Chumble spuzz. Q: What was the significance of the Erie Canal? A: In the cosmic sense, probably Nil. Q: What happened in Concord in 1775? A: Let’s be honest. You’re asking me about Concord? I rely on the bus driver to find my own house from here. Concord could be on Neptune for all I know. And what happened 220 years ago? I’m a kid. I don’t know Q: What important event took place on December 16, 1773? A: I do not believe in linear time. There is no past and future: all is one and existence in the temporal sense is illusory. This question, therefore, is meaningless and impossible to answer. Q: 2+7? A: I cannot answer this question as it is against my religious principles. Q: Mr.Jones lives 50 miles away from you. You both leave home at 5:00 & drive toward each other. Mr.Jones travels at 35 mph & you drive at 40 mph. At what time will you pass Mr.Jones on the road? A: Given the traffic around here at 5:00, who knows?

Calvin and Hobbes Garfield Dilbert Blondie Peanuts

C: What is 12 + 7? S: A Billion. C: What’s the answer to question 2? S: Eli Whitney and the Cotton Gin. C: But this is a math problem. S: It’s a trick question. C: What’s the answer to question 4? S: Imadoofus. C: What’s 7 + 6? S: Three hundred billion gazillion. That’s a 3 followed by 85 zeroes.

Abbott & Costello Bill & Ted Laurel & Hardy Wayne & Garth

Magneto Dr. Octopus Joker Green Goblin Cell

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